In case you were wondering...

IM is a little more than half over and most days I still like going to work. I may not want to go into adult medicine but somehow I manage to connect with my patients, even if they are 1. homeless,  2. suffer from mental illness 3. are sadly addicted to alcohol + street drugs + cigarettes +/- pain killers  or 4. all of the above. The patient population is definitely "challenging" and the adults often act like kids but the medicine and pathology is amazing. I heart my preceptor and had a great month with an attending that may pick apart every single thing you say but only because she cares about her patients and wants you to become a good and capable doctor. So how can I complain about that?

All in all, I can hardly believe that 3rd year will be OVER in less than 7 weeks. I am a bit anxious about next year and matching and everyone I still need to do: Step 2 CK, CS, personal statement, ERAS, interviews. I am saddened by my upper SGU classmates that did not match this year but am so happy and proud of those that did. I wish I could fast forward and be there already but at the same time I genuinely LIKE being a medical student and wouldn't mind staying right here for awhile longer. I have so much still to learn, I wish time would be slow down and speed up simultaneously.

Most of all I try to be thankful for where I am in life. I am truly blessed that I get to do what I want with my life. Medical school is hard, but it is also very rewarding and I wouldn't change a thing...

Match Day 2012

Happy Match Day! If you are looking for the SGU list, you've come to the right place. Of course it usually takes SGU a little while to get the complete list up. But keep checking. To all my matched classmates, congrats! If you are wondering what exactly this "match" that I keep referring to is than let me direct you here. I'm sure I'll have thoughts/opinions and more comments once I see the list and hear where people are going but for now I just want to congratulate everyone and reflect for a moment... In one year I hope to be preparing to find out my fate. Oh the things we do for love (of medicine in this case.)

Three Hugs

It was a good day. It was a very very good day! The kind of day where you wake up before your alarm clock goes off and you actually want to get out of bed. The kind of day for you know exactly what you want to wear. A polka dotted dress with a yellow belt. And who could have a bad day in a polka dotted dress with a yellow belt? Today was a good day. The kind of day when you can't decide on who is your favorite patient. The kind of day when your patients give you hugs and thank you for taking good care of them. Today was a good day. It was a very very good day.

no words

I never considered myself as having a problem with words. I love to write, and it has always seemed to come easily for me. But then I get to IM and my H&Ps seem on the skimpy side. For someone who was regularly told her emails were too long and that the essay only needed to be 500 words not 2000 this is an odd place to find myself. I should be able to write paragraphs about my differential diagnosis but I tend to focus on the most likely and leave out the obvious details because I think they are obvious, or written two sentences above in the labs, or I just talked about it in the HPI but I guess repetition is okay if it is important. I think I'm just modeling what I've read but just because your resident does it doesn't make it right. So I'm working on this. Also, I don't know if I just have an extra attentive Attending or if my pronunciations have been awful lately but I've been corrected when I say words too.
Random examples:
-Rhales is British so the a is an ah not a hard a.
-Triamcinolone (antibiotic) in my head has an extra syllable. And why is this called tack cream? I really don't get it.
-Petechiea (the ch is pronounced as k not a ch)

So I vow to be more thorough, more verbose and work on my pronunciations. And maybe learn some medicine while I'm at it.

I was reflecting on the patient's I've seen so far and I think I've hit all the major organ systems.
Here is the short list:
HTN (only essential)
CHF (right and left sided)
Valvular Heart Disease
Afib vs Aflutter
CAD r/o ACS
COPD
Asthma
Pneumonia
Renal Failure (acute and chronic)
Liver Cirrhosis
Hepatitis (Hep C, Viral, Tylenol OD)
Stroke
Alzheimer's
DM (but all type II so far)
Psoriasis
Reynaud's Syndrome
Panic Disorder
Depression
Bipolar Disorder
Substance Abuse (cocaine, alcohol, narcotics)

Not bad for one month into IM... I wonder what I'll see today? Whatever it is, I'll try to use my words.

*On an completely unrelated note- Happy Match Week to my SGU colleagues and other MS IVs that are anxiously waiting for Friday. Here is a link to the list. Right now it only has pre-matched students but the Canadians will be added soon and then everyone else on Friday or as soon as SGU updates it... Fingers crossed for everyone. I feel nervous this year, I can't even imagine the suspense of next year.

the zebra that wasn't

what if your patient has the worst diagnosis. not because it is something rare and horrible but just because it is.  my patient from day one of IM is still in the hospital and if he's lucky he'll leave tomorrow but still... he walked into the hospital and although he'll walk out his life has drastically changed. i'm sad for him. sad for his family. i was there. he was my first H&P of IM. i won't forgot him... he taught me not just about medicine but about being there. and about how the nicest patient's have the worst diagnosis.

IM is a quarter over which is kind of amazing. tomorrow is the last day with my resident and she's taught me a lot. i've gotten to work with three different attendings and they all had different styles. i've seen a variety of patients. mostly the basics but some interesting cases too.

i'm feeling reflective but its a good feeling. third year is winding down and mostly i feel like i still have so much to learn. but every day i hope i'm making progress.