Ode to an Attending

Get curious! This is what Dr. M would write on a sign which she would then display and point to, each and every time she asked a question re: your pt that you couldn't answer. And there was always a question. During the middle of your presentation it seemed nit picky that she would want to know if your pt's knee Sx from 18 years ago required hardware since you had no plans for your pt to get an MRI and her knee hx was in no way relevant to her CC of SOB or HPI... But the point was, Dr.M wanted YOU to know. Ditto for alcohol drink of choice, where your pt was born, what motivates your pt, LMP, current Hep C status and so on. Dr. M would say, "I am interested in all of your pts and their problems and want to hear about whatever you want talk about." And the thing was, she WAS interested and although she had already looked at the labs and read the PT report and seen the CXR she still let you fumble through your presentation, because that's how you learn and because she knows you need the practice. Dr.M would spend 45 mins to discuss the case of a pt in a vegetative state. A patient that had no chance of ever improving. But she wanted the team to help the patients family prepare for his eventual demise and she wanted everyone involved to feel comfortable with end of life issues. Dr. M would tell you exactly what you were doing wrong but she would also tell you when you did a good job, and you just had to accept that the ratio was closer to 10:1 than 1:1. Dr. M would answer her own questions and order consults when she already knew the answer. But she also admitted when she had her facts mixed up. Dr. M made you aspire to be better, and in the end, isn't that the point?

M is for...

M is my mentor. M is a Mother in Medicine. M is an NP. M was a witness at my wedding and I am forever grateful for her presence. M  has two amazing children and a wonderful Father in Medicine husband. M is the best multi-tasker I know. M is an educator. M understands patients and has touched countless lives. M embodies a good listener, when talking to her she makes you feel like you are the only person that exists.

M has taught me many things: how to interview a patient, how to build rapport with the family, how to get informed consent, how to navigate alone time with teen and parent without making either one aware of the separation, how to listen without being noticed, how to measure head circumference and how to assess Tanner stage nonchalantly. M told my about the Tuskegee syphilis experiment long before I learned about in medical school. M suggested I read "The Spirit Catches You and You Fall Down" and I am only sorry I waited so long. I finished the book last night in one sitting upon returning home from a visit with M.

I started a draft about M for Mothers in Medicine Topic Day: Our Mentors. But being the busy first term med student studying for my first exams I didn't finish or submit it. I have meant to thank M many times for her impact, for her friendship and simply for being the MiM I hope to someday be. I know this blog entry does not begin to do M justice, but I wanted to make an attempt to put her impact on my life into words.  I wanted to do this before I got caught up in MS 2 and forgot how privileged I am to have worked along side with M and learned so much from her, before I go back to Grenada where it seems I am in an alternate universe. I may not come back to New York for awhile as I am returning to California after fourth term but I don't want to forget this chapter in my life. I am so lucky to know M. If I turn out to be half the MiM that she is I will count myself blessed. Thank you M!